Enjoy it all....
“We worry about tomorrow like it’s promised...”
So this weekend we had a bit of a scare. It wasn’t something that directly happened to us, but left me really thinking about things long and hard no less. One of my best friends little boy came close to dying on Saturday; out of no where he basically just stopped breathing, there was no rhyme or reason behind, no signs or symptoms leading up to it. He just flat out stoped breathing, my poor friend had to give her five year olds, fragile and lifeless body cpr countless times just to keep him alive.
The night I heard about this all I couldn’t sleep. My mind was racing, and my heart was broken for my dear friend and her child.... All I could think was “what if that was my babies?” And it really got me thinking.
Life is just so fragile, and precious. You always hear people say things like “cherish the time you have, because you just never know when it will end.” Nothing seems more truer then that very statement now. I started analyzing all my life decisions, all my actions, basically anything and everything I’ve ever done, and all I could think is “you can do better”.
I don’t exactly mean “do better” about things like: jobs or money, I mean do better when it comes to cherishing every single moment given to me, especially when it comes to my children. In a world so overcome by social media I am no exception, I am definitely guilty of staring at my phone and scrolling endlessly rather then playing or reading or even just holding my babies. I so easily just brush them off and stare at this tiny little screen rather then engage with them. I can be short tempered and get frustrated with them quicker then I’d like to admit sometimes, and I pray for time apart from them more frequently lately.
But with just so much as a thought of losing them, I instantly regret all of that.
So I’ve vowed to do better, I know it won’t be a overnight transition (old habits are hard to break after all). But I’m definitely going to try harder. I’m going to ditch the social media after a certain time, until they are both sleeping. I’m going to play with them, make believe with them, have concerts in the middle of our living room with them, I’m going to do more of what they want to do, more often. I will hold them a little closer each day, and try my very best to keep my cool when they can’t keep theirs.
I will cherish every single moment I have with them, good or bad, because life is full of uncertainties and I would hate to look back and feel like I missed out on something or that I robbed them of anything.